I found out yesterday that one of my best friends, Amber Rae, is engaged (!!!!!!!!). She’s getting married to an incredible man named Farhad, and I couldn’t be more thrilled for her. If you saw my reaction, you would’ve thought I was the one who just got engaged. I am so ridiculously happy and excited for them. Also, they are going to make really beautiful babies.
Amber and I have known each other for a while, and we’ve been there for one another through a lot of relationship highs and lows. We’ve laughed together, cried together, been confused about relationships together, and learned a lot about love together.
I’ve seen her be excited about love before—but not like this. When she told me about Farhad for the first time, I immediately knew this guy was different. She had this incredible combination of assuredness, confidence, excitement, and peacefulness about him—about them.
She just knew. And I knew she just knew.
If you’re reading this, you probably know exactly what I’m talking about. Have you ever seen a couple together and you thought to yourself, “YES—THOSE TWO WERE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER”? Sometimes, you can just tell. You can see it in the way two people communicate, the way they fight fair, the way they dance with one another, the way they talk about and to each other. You can tell by the way they steal glances from across a room, how they hold on to one another, how they support each other through both triumph and hardship, how lovingly protective they are of one another.
Every now and again, you look at a couple, and you know that they have eyes only for each other.
That’s what I see and feel whenever I look at Amber and Farhad: a best friend who has found a love big enough to reflect her huge heart, and a man who is totally committed to and in love with the woman of his dreams.
I think it took both of them by total surprise. But of course, that is how all great love stories unfold—part of the reason they are so great is that they completely surprise us. And all of a sudden, the world looks different. More beautiful. More exciting. More comforting. More like a warm blanket you want to constantly wrap yourself in.
As I watch Amber and Farhad begin to dance through life together, I see the greatest kind of love unfolding before my eyes. It is magical and inspiring to watch. And it brings tears of joy to my eyes just thinking about it.
Because I’m so excited for them. Because I love them both so much.
But also because, when I get to see a love as powerful as theirs, it reminds me of what’s possible. What true love is supposed to feel like. That two people can become best friends, lovers, and only have eyes for each other.
Couples like Amber and Farhad remind us that if we are patient and learn to truly love ourselves first, someone will come along at exactly the right time, for exactly the right reasons, and love every ounce and inch of who we are, for exactly who we are—past, present, and future.
If you’re out there in the world wondering if and how and when the love of your life will come, stop. Stop worrying. Stop waiting for someone else to make you happy. What you really want is to build a life you’re really damn happy about, so that the right person will be able to spot you—because he or she will fall in love with your confidence and happiness. Stop asking your single friends for love advice—they have no idea what they are talking about. Stop surrounding yourself with people who are in unhappy relationships.
Whatever and whoever you surround yourself will be your future reflection.
If you want to find the love of your life, surround yourself with couples like Amber and Farhad. Couples that really get what it is to passionately and authentically love each other. Couples you look at and honestly think, “THOSE TWO WERE MADE FOR EACH OTHER.”
Watching them will be like mental love practice. And when the love of your life stumbles in unexpectedly, you’ll recognize it immediately. You’ll feel it with all of your heart and your gut. You’ll be thankful that you patiently waited. Your heart will swell with love, and life as you know it will never be the same. It’ll be a whole lot better.
You’ll just know.
The way Amber and Farhad just know.
A&F—I love you two so, so much. Thanks for being a shining example of what true love really is. You inspire everyone around you.
And thanks for reminding me of the kind of love I’m waiting for.
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